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Been Harassed in School?
| Bullies, harassment and
assaults are running rampant within the Public School Systems. Many
times, harassment, teasing, rivalry, ridicule, emotional or physical violence
can lead to depression and low self-esteem, problems that can traumatize
a child into adulthood and affect a student for the rest of their life.
According to a government study, victims often fear school, that 'somebody
might hurt them' at school, and consider school to be an unsafe and unhappy
place. As many as 7% of America's eighth graders stay home at least once
a month because of bullies. The act of being bullied tends to increase
some students' isolation because their peers do not want to lose status
by associating with them or because they do not want to increase the risks
of being bullied themselves.*
The
First truth: There will never be a shortage of bullies.
Putting this in perspective:
In the workplace bullies are not tolerated. Bullies are laid off,
fired, sued, and/or jailed. On the street, if someone punches you
it's an assault and you have the right to defend yourself and press charges.
One more perspective:
How a child perceives a bully depends on how an Administrator, (Principals,
Teachers, etc.), deals with the bully.
("Effective
principals are liked and respected, rather than feared, and communicate
caring for students as well as willingness to impose punishment if necessary")
If Administrator's have strong anti bully rules then bullying will be understood
as unacceptable behavior. ("Identifying potentially
violent students and intervening before serious problems erupt has become
a high priority...") |
- Special Report -
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Is YOUR child
being bullied?
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The
Second truth: Administrators in charge, (Principals, Teachers, Counselors,
etc.) who take the TIME to investigate harassment accusations will have
safer schools.
Putting this in perspective:
Valued employees are promoted, given incentives, bonuses, and good pay
to keep them employed at their job. Complaints are taken seriously
and are investigated. The investment in re-training a valuable employee
insures that all efforts will be made to keep the ones they have.
One more perspective:
Sometimes it's easier to call everything a "fight", disagreement, "clash
of personalities", than to give victim's the time to say what's happened
to them. Children should be considered by School Districts as valuable
employees/customers. There is nothing better than a happy customer!
("...any
student making violent threats towards others should be required to complete
a psychological assessment process and parental conferencing.")
The
Third truth: Secured and watched schools (inside and out) are a major
factor in ensuring the safety of students and staff.
Putting this in perspective:
At a workplace, if someone is injured because a piece of equipment falls
on them, would the Employer say that they can't be responsible for what
happens inside their building(s)?
One more perspective:
More and more School Districts are realizing, because of tragic events
like Columbine, that each child deserves a safe, secure, learning, happy
environment. ("School discipline has two main goals:
(1) ensure the safety of staff and students, and (2) create an environment
conducive to learning.")
The
Fourth truth: The stigma can be severe if the student talks about their
abuser, bully or harasser.
Putting this in perspective:
In the adult world "tattletales" are called "Whistle blowers", and are
protected. Many times they are treated as heroes when all is said
and done. If the workplace abuse is not solved, governmental agencies
or lawyers swoop down upon the business and tear it apart.
One more perspective:
A child should be just as protected as an adult when they become a whistle
blower. Administrators must take seriously students who make complaints,
no matter how small.
("Adults sometimes have a tendency
to discount what adolescents say, believing that most of the stress youngsters
experience will pass as maturation occurs. This lack of empathy on the
part of adults may leave adolescents feeling misunderstood and alienated.")
The
Fifth truth: Victims of bullies, harassment, assault, and other violence
inside their schools, are not getting the counseling they require.
Putting this in perspective:
If a mother is Abused by her husband there are shelters where she can go
to get help. She will be told that she is a victim and didn't deserve
to be beat up. There are places for adults to get help for Abuse, Rape,
drinking problems, depression, stress, anxiety, etc.
One more perspective:
Programs should be in place for students who are victims of bullies, harassment
or assault in every school. ("Students who have witnessed
or been involved in violence suffer from post traumatic stress, which can
include anxiety, fear, emotional constriction, attention difficulties,
and sleeplessness. Thus, just as victims need counseling when they leave
the emergency room, students who were bystanders to the violence need carefully
led discussions to help them with their confusion, grief, and anger")
Feb.
12 - A Parent says...
"I would like to have
some advise about our case, my wife and my other daughter are suffering
emotionally. We don't know what to do. Please, we need your
help."
What can
you do if your child is being harassed?
Demand action!
-
Give the
school a reasonable amount of time to work out minor problems to your child's
satisfaction and your satisfaction as a parent.
-
In cases
of a major harassment situation such as a physical or sexual assault, call
the police immediately. These type of serious offenses must be handled
by the police and entered on the abuser or perpetrator's police record
or Juvenile Record. School Administrators can take some action's
against the perpetrator(s) but they are not police officers.
-
Document
everything! Tape record statements, type them up and have witnesses
sign the statements. Take pictures of injuries, places (buildings),
people, etc.
-
Write
letters to School Board Members. Write letters to Board members separately
and after each incident of harassment.
-
Write
a letter to the Superintendent. Write a letter to the Superintendent
after each incident of harassment.
-
Write
a letter to The Principal of the school. Write a letter to the Principal
after each incident of harassment.
-
Go to
School Board meeting and speak out. It's not just your child that
you are thinking about, but all the other children who are harassed and
have parents who won't, or don't know how, to speak for them.
-
Write
multiple letters to your State Representatives (The Education Committee).
Tell them what is happening in your school and how your Administrators
are handling your child's case. Ask them to support State laws to
protect kids who are whistle blowers and stronger laws to punish bullies
and perpetrators of harassment. Write a letter to each member of
the Committee separately and after each incident of harassment. Send a
copy of your letters to the School Board Members, Superintendent and Principal
of the offending school.
-
Write
a letter to the Editor of your local newspaper. Do not embarrass
your child with details, but write instead about your schools lack of response
for harassed students in general.
-
Call a
lawyer. If you have not been satisfied with the response you have received
from School Administrators within a reasonable period of time, about two
weeks, then hire an Attorney. If this is a case of a major harassment
situation (# 2), such as a physical or sexual assault, call an Attorney
within 24 hours.
To order "Bullycide in America",
click on the link below
Who
are the REAL HEROES when it comes to bullying?
From the Boston Herald,
March 28, 2001 - Jules Crittenden
"...Threats
of teen violence prompted a student walkout in Newburyport and led to arrests
in Derry, N.H., this week.
In
Newburyport, about 17 students at the Nock Middle School walked out of
classes Monday, claiming the school administration hasn't done enough in
response to threatening behavior by one or more students.
'We're
all out here because the teachers are not listening to us,' one girl who
said she had been threatened told the Daily News of Newburyport.
She said one student had threatened to kill other kids and had e-mailed
bloody pictures.
A
protesting boy said students are afraid the student will be allowed to
return to class. Efforts to reach Nock Principal Douglas Lay yesterday
were unsuccessful."
These
teens are heroes for what they did on this day! They are the type
of students who will wipe out bullying in all schools. Administrators
will take notice when enough students demand action. I would love
to hear more stories like this in the news instead of the sad aftermath
of bullying when it's too late to do anything.
For research, please visit,
http://www.jaredstory.com/vip_links_bullying.html
>>
>>
>>
HEAR JARED'S VOICE
- PLAY - From
an interview with Pasco School District investagators concerning the assault.
This is a recording of a recording and it isn't real clear, but worth the
download effort. Jared had a real mellow voice.
Note: If you have a slow load wav, wait for it to load entirely and then
play again from the start. 5 minutes long.
Brenda's Vibes on bullying:
3
Step For Parents When Dealing With Bullying
School
Bullying is an Adult Problem
Online
Bullying – Solving the Cyberbullying Problem
How
to Stop School Bullying
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