Suicide  Bullying  depression

DESIRE' NICOLE DREYER

Cheer Angel 2006
Born April 3, 1989 / Died January 18, 2006 
by Suicide / Depression 

Reflections by Donna Dreyer, Desire's mom

My daughter, Desire' Dreyer attended Glen Este High School in Amelia, Ohio.  She was a varsity cheerleader, had a personality that we all only wish we could possess, had a smile that would take your breath away, had a heart of gold and had more friends than any of us will ever have in this lifetime.  But on a cold wintery day, January 18, 2006 she took her own life, the day I died inside.   She was being bullied by a group of girls from her school. When we moved to Amelia Ohio four years ago, my daughter had a few issues with the move, but she seemed to have adjusted when she started making new friends, made the cheerleading squad and met a young man, the boyfriend of her dreams.

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But there were a few girls that just could not leave well enough alone. 

My daughter had a few health issues, sometimes her and her boyfriend fought, sometimes we fought about the usual teenage stuff, (her staying out to late, keeping her grades up), the bullies teased her about these things, they even harassed her about having it all, (meaning she had a loving family, nice home, was a varsity cheerleader and a handsome boyfriend, (a running back for the varsity football team).  These girls threw things at her in classrooms (while the teachers turned their heads and walked out of the classroom), chased her into the girl’s restrooms at school and told her if "it" didn't happen inside of school it would outside of school.  There were other incidents of a group of girls that followed her home from Homecoming in 2005 and threatened her in front of our house.  The bullies even went as far as to be waiting on her one night when the school bus she was on (the cheerleaders had to ride the bus to away football games) arrived back at her High School.  They followed her to a local restaurant and surrounded her car.  My daughter called the police from her cell phone. 

This is the kind of bullying my daughter had to endure.  While I knew of some of these issues, I did not know the extent of the bullying.  I was told by the small school principal that the problem was taken care of, only to find out the group of girls did not stop.  My daughter did not want to go to school, her grades dropped drastically, she became severely depressed.  I did not know that the bullying was the cause; if only I had known then what I know now, if only I had known that all the signs she portrayed were signs of being bullied, which lead her to depression, which in turn led her to suicide. 
 

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The school has tried to brush this under the rug since the day she took her life. They told the students at the school they were not allowed to take the day off for her funeral.  They told the students they could show no signs that my daughter even existed.  (For example, some students had written Desire's name on the back window of their cars, had dog tags made up with her picture and name on them - the students were told that if they had her name on their car windows they would not be allowed to park in the school parking lot.  They were told to remove the dog tags).  The school will not even allow us to place a bench on school property in Desire’s memory, but there are other benches, trees, shadow boxes, etc at the school for all other students that have passed away. There were approximately 1,000 students, family and friends that attended Desire's funeral. My daughter had known a lot of people; she never met a stranger.

The only time we have spoken with any of the school personnel is when my husband and I approached the Board of Education. They never once approached us regarding any of the bullying that was going on at the school.  We feel as if they just want to brush the whole bullying issue under the rug and move on.  They don’t have the decency to admit to the public that they should have taken appropriate action against the bullies, instead they gave them a slap on their hands and sent them back to class with my daughter, the same classes my daughter begged them to remove her from but they would not.

The West Clermont School District has initiated a program called the Olweus Bullying Program.  The program is geared towards training school personnel and students how to handle bullying situations. Although, I strongly believe that this program will not work if school personnel, students and parents do not play a major role. 

I just wish for a half of a second the school administration and the bullies could see how it feels to be in my shoes, to make yourself get out of bed everyday by the grace of God and go into Desire’s bed room just to hope that maybe, just maybe this has all been a bad dream, but then only to see that she is not there. Our house is so empty, her laughter that was once is no more, quite often I find I cannot take the silence.  There is a heavy weight that is a constant on my shoulders. I die inside over and over everyday. I see her and think about her in everything I say and do. There is no rhyme or reasoning left in my life.  Things that mattered before don't even have a place in my life anymore.  The only thing that keeps me going at this point is I know that some day I will see her again.
 

The memorial marker at a park in our sub division	Desire' and her boyfriend at Homecoming in 2005

Cheer Angel 2006

You’re my Angel
You see me through
Believe in me 
I’ll believe in you
You fill my heart from you loving will
You pick me up when I’m feeling down
Or when I stumble on shaky ground
You’re my answer when I can’t tell
When I am weary and way behind
When I am clearly out of my mind
When I find I’m in my own hell
You’re my Angel.

 

STORIES OF "BULLYCIDES" (SUICIDE'S ATTRIBUTED TO BULLYING)	STORIES OF BULLYING SURVIVORS WHO SPEAK ABOUT THE PAIN
The "Bullycide" of Jared High The "Bullycide" of April Himes The "Bullycide" of Jeffrey Johnston The "Bullycide" of Jessica Haffer The "Bullycide" of Corinne Sides The "Bullycide" of Ryan Halligan Our Special Cassie The "Bullycide" of Matt Epling "I wish I could reverse time" "Nice Girls Finish Last Too" Bullies who Kill - Brandon's Story The "Bullycide" of Desire' Dreyer	Matthew's Story Bruce's Story The "Hidden" Disability School, The Nightmare! "When Black Ants Scream" (pdf) Dacia's "Homework" Wounded Kids/Parents talk Roger Dean Kiser Silent Rage by Bill Rose Joey's Page - BullyFree4Me Questions about Jared & Bullying The Gentle Giant

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To order "Bullycide in America", click on the link below

ARTICLES Bullying	ARTICLES Bully-Prevention
An Interview With a Killer School Violence Chat on ABC "Popularity Wars" - Dr. M. Thompson Been Harassed at Work? The Legal Connection Grading Anti Bullying Laws Been Harassed in School?	Bullying is an ADULT Problem STOP BULLYING! Suicide and Schools Letter to the Education Committee Making a Difference An Anti Bullying "Travel Log" in AZ AMA - Physicians & Bullying

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BULLYING OR "BULLYCIDE" in the NEWS Victims Fight Back - lawsuit The Wounded Spirit Wounded Kid's talk Serious Bullying - School Shootings $11 Million Ruling - NY

VIBES about Bullying 3 Step For Parents When Dealing With Bullying School Bullying is an Adult Problem Online Bullying – Solving the Cyberbullying Problem How to Stop School Bullying

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HEAR JARED'S VOICE - PLAY - From an interview with Pasco School District investagators concerning the assault.  This is a recording of a recording and it isn't real clear, but worth the download effort.  Jared had a real mellow voice.     Note: If you have a slow load wav, wait for it to load entirely and then play again from the start.   5 minutes long.

A Congressman speaks out about bullying, and in support of an anti bullying law in Arizona
"The school ground bully has been around for too long.  His entire success at bullying is predicated upon arrogant disregard to simple decency, and a willingness to brutalize an innocent victim simply because the bully is bigger and stronger and others are afraid to intervene.  It is insidious and calls for society and government to intervene decisively.  This bullying bill is a start.  As you deliberate this bill please reflect on the fact that Government's primary purpose for existence is for the protection of its innocent citizens.   ...Then remember your bully as a child."      Congressman Trent Franks (R) Arizona

Other VIBES

How to Cook Great Pumpkin Seeds The Science of Magnets Protect Yourself From ID Theft Surviving Carpal Tunnel Surgery Dirt Cake Recipe Be Nice to Nerds

Canceling your Cell Phone Contract Waving Your Credit Card Fees Children of the Secret State So You Need a Refund? How to do an E-Book Space - Putting things into perspective

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